Pregnancy — in my dreams

October 11, 2007

I am off to the airport (to go to a conference in Savannah, GA) in about two hours, so this post will have to be short, as I have a workout, a shower, and breakfast to fit in in that time. BUT, I had to share this weird dream I had last night!

In the dream, I was totally pregnant. The weird part was, I was also, inexplicably, a time-traveler, sort of like Dana in Octavia Butler’s novel Kindred–which I just taught recently, so that may explain why my subconscious mind went there. So, in the dream, I was my current “self,” as in, October 2007 me who as far as I know is not pregnant, but I had time-traveled into a not-very-distant future where I *was* pregnant. Twice, as it happens. The first time I was maybe 6 months along, and my memories of that part of the dream are fairly fuzzy, unfortunately. Although I think Queen Latifah was there. ???

The second time I “time-traveled” to become my future pregnant self, though, I was fully nine months pregnant and had a ginormous belly, which was carrying quite low. I remember looking down and thinking, “maybe the baby has finally dropped.” My mother was also there, and I was asking her whether I had been a late baby (I think the baby I was carrying was a few days beyond due date–and a girl, as I remember saying, “Typical little girl! Just like her mother, always late!”). My mom, in her usual fashion when I try to subtly quiz her about her pregnancy with me, was maddeningly inconclusive: “Well, I’m not sure. I think you were on time, but I don’t really remember… It was 30 years ago!” As I said, though, I concluded that my daughter was totally following in her mom’s footsteps with going past due date.

In the dream three of my students came by the apartment to bring a gift for the baby, but were disappointed to discover that she hadn’t been born yet. Then I recall doing a lot of cleaning–for some reason our apartment was really dusty! oh wait, that’s pretty much like our non-dream reality. One thing that wasn’t like reality was that R&B singer Chris Brown was my first cousin in the dream, and somehow I had just discovered this fact! He and I were having some kind of funny conversation about my pregnancy, which included me saying, “I can’t believe you’ve been my cousin all this time! Think of how much cachet I’d have with my students if they knew!” Yes, I am rolling my eyes at my subconscious right now too.

Anyway, right before I woke up I think was getting closer to going into labor. There was something about a mucous plug falling out, or something? (Wow, was this dream specific.) I’m not entirely sure, but in the dream I remember thinking, “hmm, well that’s progress–now when will my water break?”

Was that weird or was that weird? Kind of enjoyable too, though. I was surprised at how natural it felt to have a huge belly and an impending journey through labor. I think my dreams may be as close as I get to pregnancy this month, though, since G and I again only had sex once pre-O (as far as I know–I’m not really sure when I ovulated). That kind of hole-in-one thing has never worked for us in the past, so it certainly would be a surprise for it to start now!

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3 Responses to “Pregnancy — in my dreams”

  1. Deathstar Says:

    Hi there, just thought I’d let you know that there’s another black woman out there who has wrestled with infertility – and in my case, lost, but I’ve been reading through some of your posts and I just wanted to let you know. By the way, don’t wait for 100% feeling it’s a good time to get pregnant, because it never happens. And it’s normal to have doubts, just follow your heart and think ahead – does your future have children in it or not? Peace.

  2. loren Says:

    Wow, that is a VERY specific dream! Don’t you love pregnancy dreams? 😉 It’s as if our subconscience wants us to get a taste of what it would be like, since its all our conscience minds think about! Thank you for your lovely comment. I hope you caught that eggie that one lovefest. 😉

  3. Kim Says:

    CityProf –

    I am loving your blog. I, too, am a Sista who is struggling with infertility. I was getting so frustrated and felt alone with how I was feeling..I thought there weren’t any of “us” out there willing to share our stories so I started a blog as well. Funny how the Lord does all things in order and now I’ve stumbled upon your blog. 🙂 I LOVE IT. Know that you are not alone in the struggle. I pray that we, and other sistas, would speak out and let our voices be heard…and that we can all be a voice of encouragement for each other. It’s hard to hear God’s voice in the midst of all the BBT and cervical fluid watching..LOL..but He DOES hear us. 🙂 Blessing to you! 🙂

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